| hello all find myself her again |
[Feb. 16th, 2009|01:41 pm] |
hi i haven't been on this site for over a year now as i dicided to try and get some help and try and sort my crazy life out, it worked for a while but yesterday while at work someone commented on the colour of my scrubs (im a nurse and the different colours on the back indicate what size they are) i hate that as everyone can see what size your wearing. i used to wear yellow which is small but after a year of citlapram and eating groups im now a white which is large. OK i've put on weight theres no need to fucking comment on it at work, so this morning i weighted myself for the 1st time in 13 months and cried all morning i have put on 18 pounds and i just want to die.
so im starting again, today have had 2 hoodia 40mg of frusimide (dierectic) 1 small bowl of rice thats it now going on nightshift tonight so i have no oppertunities to eat total cal intake 400 plus 13 hour night shift. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 5th, 2008|01:00 pm] |
im so pi ssed off at work at the moment just cant seem to get motivated and im so tiered all the time really need a good rest.
im 10 10 today its taken ages but im where i should have been two weeks ago damn period causing me to eat loads oh well back on track today starting 2468 so far o cals going to have my 200 for diner tonight x |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 19th, 2008|03:45 pm] |
so i never managed my cals at the gym the other day FAILURE and then to top it all off i ened up purging last night for the first time ever now i feel like shit today and my throat really hurts stupid stupid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
well im now 10.13 so 7 pounds lost not enough will do better will try harder |
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| 1000cal gym session |
[May. 15th, 2008|08:04 am] |
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ok 11 2 today going to go to the gym in a minute but im so tired my goal at the gym today HAS to be at least 1000cals i dont care how long it takes me i have to do it, matts cooking tonight so i need to ristrict so hard today so i can at dinner with him going to hurt so bad when i get back must be strong i can do this!!!! |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 14th, 2008|05:07 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  angry | ] |
walked 5 miles burnt 300 cals at work ate 300 cals weight lost today...... nothing gurrrrr most pissed off
hate myself hate hate hate!!!!!!!!!! |
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| 3 miles 129 cals |
[May. 13th, 2008|03:54 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  curious | ] |
so pissed off had 492 cals yesterday and wore a pedometer to work which said i walked 3 miles and burnt 129 cals (it was a really really quiet night only one patient ) and got on scales today all excited and.... nothing completely the same 11.3 wanker really thought i would have lost at least a pound!!!!
going to wear it to work again its really good kept checking it to see how many cals i had burn was really satisfing,
hope tonights really busy so i burn more !! |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 12th, 2008|06:08 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | sofa | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  tired | ] |
ok so i have to go to work in a mo just itting here getting ready for another hellish night shift found a pedominter not sure if that spelt right so im going to wear it to work tonight will be intereting to see 1) how far i actual walk about at work and 2) how many calories i burn so quite excited very sad i know.
really tired today need to sleep night kill me theres something very wrong about eating luch at 3am x |
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| bollocks!! |
[Jan. 9th, 2008|02:07 pm] |
ok thought i was going to be at my first goal weight by now but im not im so fucked off.
im 11 stone 3 so from 11.6 3 hole pounds what a fucking waste of space i am. so from today its back on track have signed up with a personal trainner who is fucking harsh must have been some crazy drill sergent before, thought i was going to puke on the cross trainer today, but i love it!!! started taking phentamine again which really helps to stop me snacking as i dont want to eat anything on these. so only juice and steamed veg from now on !!!!!!!! |
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| Im back |
[Nov. 23rd, 2007|10:14 am] |
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Right im back at the end of summer i had reached 10 stone only half a stone of my goal then it all fell apart, its now november and i have gone back up to 11 stone 6 ok so its time to dig deep and pull out my old friend self control again. at this moment i weigh 11.1 stones thanks to my new best friend phentermine i hope to be down to my goal before christmas lets see. |
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hearts4may's journal